I struggle to translate feelings into words at this time of year. Do you know how that goes? I could write volumes about winter coats or book ends or any other bit of randomosity a client may care to throw my way. But a new year...a fresh start...is something that runs too deep for such casual flippancy as I'm accustomed to publishing. I'm a firm believer in a do-over and january 1st is my cosmic reset button.
Sooooo when it came time to write the all-important holiday post...I just didn't write it. I kept it to myself. And it was brilliant - just like everything else I compose in my head. My transcendent new year's tradition consists of me, at home, all by myself, with twelve months worth of memories, regrets, triumphs, and licked wounds. I won't attempt to describe what I experience during this, my favorite holiday, but I will give you an inkling.
Today my girlies came over to play dress-up and my house was reduced to sartorial rubble. Dolly, being a very sophisticated four, was more concerned with accessorizing. At first, she was so carried away by the selection she ended up doubling her weight in scarves and jewellery. She stood before the mirror in her mountain of finery and said, quite eloquently, 'I don't even look like me anymore'.
The bean on the other hand preferred to settle on one favorite and wear it all the day long. She clunked and clattered that one shoe across my laminate floor in an endless circle, happy as a clam and disdainful of the trails of useless frippery left by her big sister. After a while of watching these two precious little individuals, they both seemed to reach a place of compromise. Dolly shed her layers and started to choose more selectively. The bean condescended to wear a few scarves.
As I stand in front of my spiritual mirror and examine the results of a year's careful tailoring, I decide what was meaningful and what might be deemed excess finery. I take the things I loved most and see if they can be enhanced and complimented. I strip away the distracting, the ill-fitting, and the irrelevant and try to find the true character. The purpose. The joy. In a way, it is an exercise in style. I am co-creator with diety and our grand masterpiece is me. A little tired after 2012, a little sore, but still very much a work in progress.
A happy belated new year to all.
...and yes, there is a straw sheriff's hat at my house.